20 Things to Do to Keep From Being an Accidental Leader, Part I
Strategically Create the Life and Work Worthy of your Talents, Giftings, Education and Experience
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Take A Behavioral Style Profile to learn your strengths and weaknesses. Contact me for more information.
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Take a Strengths Finder to compliment the Personality Profile
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Interview your parents, assuming you have a good relationship with them, and ask them what they saw in you as a child, i.e., the strengths they perceived in you that would translate into a career, or other direction for your life
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Ask 5 friends what they see you’re good at and one thing they see you might work on for greater success
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Deal with any and all childhood issues that could be showing up as blind-spots, limitations or weaknesses. This is KEY to your progress. Ask me for more information if this intrigues you, as I have a workshop that could get you started, and would gladly tell you about my experience with it
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Learn to use the 24 hr. Rule, to get over a crisis, disappointment, or a “win”, and keep yourself moving forward. (I’ve written on this in past posts, and will write on it again this week.)
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Begin a “Gratefulness Journal” and write every day of at least 5 things you are most grateful/thankful for.
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Take a class on “Time Management”, creating systems for every area of your life and work
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Create your own personal “Mission Statement” and choose 5 to 8 values by which to base, and use as a plumb-line, all the major decisions you make life
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Once a year go on a week or month long “Negativity Fast” where you allow family and friends to fine you if you say anything negative about yourself, others, or circumstances. You’ll be amazed at how cleansing this is! Take it up a notch and add not listening to any negativity as well!
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Determine from now on to make decisions based on living out your values and Mission Statement.
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Find a mentor. Look for 2 people you admire in different aspects of their life, and then ask them if they would consider mentoring you.
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Create some form of self imposed accountability for yourself.
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Learn to be a better communicator, especially in the area of listening. Most leaders get into trouble more by not listening than by talking.
Stay tune for the rest of the list of 20things, and how to get some help accomplishing these in the next post!
YOU HEARD BUT ARE YOU LISTENING?
THE ONE SKILL EVERY LEADER NEEDS MORE 
You as a leader/ manager are so busy these days that complete clear communication sometimes never happens. Do you know if you’re really hearing what people are really saying? Is there a way to be sure that you are? Yes, there is, and it’s amazingly simple I can’t even believe it. I was recently given a book on conflict resolution that make it such a huge deal. What I’ve discovered is that 80% of the conflicts tend to be: one person didn’t say what the meant or didn’t use the right words to convey it, so the other person heard the words, but not the intent. Or, the other person misunderstood completely what the other person was truly communicating and immediately jumped to assumptions and judgment based on what they heard, not what the person meant. When I can get people together to work through and learn this process, it’s amazing how much clears up. Don’t believe me, get on this complimentary call yourself and you be the judge!
During this tele-class you’ll examine, how to increase your leadership influence. You will gain practical tips on how to disagree with people without them ever knowing it, keeping them on your team. You’ll learn how to provide appropriate feedback, while discovering the one thing you should never do when you have to correct an employee.
DATE: August 25th
TIME: 12:00pm until 1:00pm MST
WHERE: Teleclass – on the phone (you will receive the # before the seminar)
GIVEN BY: Sue Porter – “The Accidental Leader”
COST: complimentary introductory rate – you must sign-up to receive the conference call number and materials
MONDAY MORSALS for Leaders
It takes true dedication to achieve transformation! 90% of people who attend seminars see NO IMPROVEMENT in their lives. The 
same goes for reading self-help books, listening to tapes/CD’s or even to a sermon for that matter. And why is that? Because you have to implement what you’ve learned. It must be linked to the listener’s life and experiences. Knowledge alone does virtually nothing. An example I heard once, was that in this day and age everyone knows it is bad for your health to smoke, but for an avid smoker, that fact doesn’t change their habit! Humm…think about it. On top of that, although we spend 55% of our time listening, the sad thing is that 70% of what is said gets screened out, or misunderstood. So, is it effective for one to spend the majority of time at a workshop listening, or would it be better spent engaging the hearer in activities that will ingrain a lesson, searing it into their mind for future reference? Humor, stories and skits aid in this process. But for a new skill, competency, or attitude to become route, you must provide some form of action plan with accountability. This can be done in the form of coaching, or even with an accountability partners. (For more information on coaching, see the tab on the main page of this web-site)
My father, Dr. Don Barnes, was a professor of secondary education at the University of Arizona. This meant that if you were going for your doctorate in education, he was one of two professors you would have had. His passion was to actually have his students “achieve learning” so that they would be better equipped to be a principals, administrators, or teachers. I learned from him the value of engaging people in the learning process, by encouraging them to discover, banter, negotiate, and observe for themselves, ultimately applying their learning experiences to their life. As a leader or manager, we tend to want to take the easy way, and just “tell” our employees what to, or not to do. And, in some instances this may be necessary. In meetings though, we can bore them to death, as we drone on, leaving them clueless in the end as to the purpose of the meeting in the first place. Next time you have an important point to make, or change to initiate to establish, be creative, facilitate the learning process. Asking questions and leading a discussion takes work, but believe me, they’ll own the answer and outcome considerably more! Now to do this, you can’t be the “answer” man/woman, but must allow them to think they came up with the solution on their own. And, they just may surprise you, and come up with a better one than you were thinking of. You won’t receive the credit, but the organization/company will benefit from their greater commitment, involvement, and contribution. Here’s to you dad, thanks! Sue
The One Skill That Will Make You Seem Like a Real Life “Hero”
I DARE YOU TO TAKE THIS LEADERSHIP CHALLENGE
I never said a complete thought but that the conversation was overridden, and my train of thought either finished by him or completely aborted. And, I can guarantee, he was clueless as to what he was doing. I could tell he was use to being given free, complete reign of every conversation, and why not, he was THE BOSS their leader. Highly intelligent, moving at the rate of the Daytona 500, with more vision and energy than most exude in a life time. I’m use to this. It’s the typical MO of my success driven entrepreneurial clients who are the leaders of their world. Works 24/7 with endless ideas and metabolism. But with all the fervent, feverish drive, they’re usually missing the very glue that keeps people energized and willing to continue with enthusiasm to play on their team.
I’m guilty many times myself. I’ve spent years learning, practicing and failing using this “ONE” grand leadership skill that can transform not only the person, but the very climate of an office overnight. When you use it, you become the most brilliant person anyone has known. People will not only like entrepreneurial,leaders,leadership, leadership skills, listening, leadership influence you, they’ll think you’re just fabulous, even when you’ve never mentioned a word about what you do, or who you are. I’m sure you already know, it’s the are of LISTENING. Now, I didn’t say hearing, I said listening. You can hear the train, answering the phone, and hearing the headlines on TV all at the same time. But listening, that’s an art. Think you already do it? We’ll see. Take the 48 hr test. Yes, I said test. You think you’ve got it so together? Take the next 48 hours and go on a fast. No, not from food, from talking about yourself. I dare you. Don’t give an opinion, don’t share an accomplishment an idea or any vision. Don’t talk about yourself. That is, of course, unless you’re asked a question, but even then, be brief and amazing with your answer. Keep a log. Write a slash every time you fail, but don’t give up. We’ll talk next time about the value and benefits you’ll receive. Then let me know how you do. And if you’re really hot stuff, try it for a week. Then we’ll know just how much you want Leadership Influence!
